"Magna Man and the Metal Meets Him"

It was like any other day, except that it was a bit overcast. I was walking along the neighborhood garden path, thinking peaceful thoughts to myself, when a searing, white-hot bolt of electric lightning slammed into me, temporarily turning me into a transistor. The bolt eventually died away, but I didn't. Instead, I fell to the ground, writhing and convulsing as my overloaded nervous system tried to return to normal.

Hours later, I woke up to the pleasant sound of rain pelting me. I was soaked to the skin, and my body was wracked with pain. All in all, I felt pretty good for just having been struck by lightning. I stood up and began walking away, when metal objects suddnely began to slam into every part of my body. I was covered in steel and iron. Instantly, I realized I had become a human magnet.

Days later, I had my mom make me a special "Magna Man" uniform, complete with boots, cape and tights. I was going to fight crime as a superhero.

My first time out, I spotted a damsel in distress; her purse had been stolen by some thug. I dashed into action, and quickly caught up with the thief.

"Stealing purses, eh?" I asked.

"Who the heck are you?" he demanded.

With pride, I replied "Magna Man!"

"You're crazy," he said.

I was starting to get a little winded. "Let's stop for a minute and take a breather," I suggested.

The robber pulled out a Beretta 9mm handgun, and leveled it at me. "Forget you, chump," he said.

As he fired, I dove out of the way. I looked behind me and saw the bullet curve toward me. I couldn't believe it! My magnetism was attracting the bullet!

I ran off, trying to escape the bullet, but it stayed right behind me, turning when I did.

Finally,I yanked open a door, and threw myself behind it. The bullet slammed into the door, and I was safe.

Perhaps this superhero stuff wasn't for me, after all...


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